South Park: Project D
by captainwii
Summary: Takes place just after Stick of Truth, the New Kid now just seeks adjusting to life in South Park outside the game he's been playing with the boys, but the revelation of finding out why he and his parents moved here leaves him haunted with many questions on his mind, and the only way to answer them is for him to find out the government's plan to use him for evil; called Project D.
1. Chapter 1

Out of all the things in my life, I don't think I'll ever forget those first few days.

It's funny though, the first thing I remembered was moving into South Park with my parents, which was just days ago, and just minutes later, found myself drafted into playing a LARPing session with the neighborhood kids. Well, that's assuming a LARP is the right thing to call it.

This was the sort of game I played that had me fighting Nazi Zombies, infiltrating an abortion clinic, running around Canada, and, ugh, going up a male prostitute's ass.

Mr. Slave, as much as I think he's a nice guy, I think he seriously needs to clean out those bowels of his, I still get nightmares of that incident.

But I'm getting ahead myself.

Who am I? my name is Dovahkiin Perkins, I'm a 9-year-old boy now living in South Park, Colorado.

Appearance wise, I'm Caucasian, I have short hot pink hair. (I know it's weird, but from what I've gathered, I was born with it) and I typically wear a pink hoodie with pink jeans.

I know what you're thinking, why would a 9-year-old boy like me have such a fascination with pink? frankly, I don't remember, but most of my wardrobe has pink clothes for a long as I could remember (which, if you gathered, wasn't really long). Besides, I personally never saw anything wrong with wearing pink, and oddly enough, no one in South Park has ever given me grief over it, some people have commented on my hair every now and then, but that's about it.

Anyway, I won't bore you with all the details, to make a long story.. a little bit shorter, after the insane roller coaster playing that game put me through, I ended up becoming the kid who managed to have nearly everyone in town as a friend... on Facebook.

Oh, as well as the fact I became 9-year-old killing machine that made aliens and underpants gnomes crap themselves in terror, mostly metaphorically speaking, of course. And it's all thanks to the training I got when I was starting out in this whole LARPing thing I've been doing.

And abit more recently, I found out I had the U.S government hunting for me because of my talent for making friends, which turned out to be the main reason my parents and I moved to South Park, and why my memory was wiped.

Was that alot to take in? if so, I don't blame you, I still have a hard time wrapping my head around what's been going on with my life.

But it wasn't all bad, things have calmed down since last night, where I had to help siege Clyde's fortress, fight a Nazi Zombie Princess Kenny, and did I mention I climbed up into Mr. Slave's butt?

Anyway, the next day, as I said, was much quieter, I woke up and checked my Facebook on my phone to find neither 'Grand Wizard' Cartman nor 'King of the Drow Elves' Kyle calling over for anything.

Cartman... Now he's the sort of guy I never thought I'd have to deal with. It's common knowledge in town that he's the resident egotistical jerk, but ever since I first came to this town, he's consistently treated me with much more friendliness than he's clearly ever given almost anyone else.

That's right, the guy hates gingers, yet he apparently thinks a pink-haired boy is perfectly acceptable, try explaining that.

One thing about that bothers me about him though, from the start, he gave me some implication that he knows me more than I know myself, he already knew my family and I would move to South Park, he clearly already knew my 'power' of getting friends on Facebook faster than most people, and he's gone out my way to make me an important part of that game we were playing, like he knew from the start I'd be his triumph card in that fantasy war we've been doing.

Kyle seems to think Cartman is just using me though, and that's likely true, but if so, he seems to be putting a heck load of work into making me want to be used.

But either way, whether or not there's anything genuine about the way Cartman's been treating me, I think I'll find out for certain eventually, after all, I've only known him and his other friends for afew days.

Speaking of Kyle, well, he seems to be pretty bossy at times, but otherwise strikes me as a good person with good intentions, if nothing else, his focus on my involvement seems to be just doing whatever he can to keep Cartman from influencing me as much as possible.

Kind of like a stern, but fair, dad whose idea of what's best for kid is to keep him as far away as possible from a chubby mom who's more easy going and encouraging, but obviously more manipulative and selfish.

Okay, wierd analogy, but the more I think about it, even though both Kyle and Cartman consider themselves my friends, the way they act around me, sometimes especially when they're in a 3 to 4 square foot radius of me, makes it seem like they're more like they're trying to be a pair of divorced parents arguing over who gets custody over their one New Kid.

Good Lord, as if my real dad getting annoyed with my unwillingness to talk wasn't bad enough.

Granted, I know I'm not the only reason those two get at each other's throats, but I find it a little weird that they both think I'm worth the trouble.

Frankly, I'm surprised Kyle doesn't put as much effort in keeping Butters a good distance away from Cartman, I think if anyone deserves better than Cartman, it's him.

Now Butters, he's one guy I liked from the moment we first met, and one his first reactions to seeing me for the first time was to immediately declare himself my friend, which I found weird, but comforting at the same time.

I was troubled to learn that Butters was such a big target of bullying. Heck, he casually talks about getting beaten up at certain parts of town. Which made no sense to me, why would anyone want to hurt someone as nice and friendly as him?

One thing's for sure, if I ever see any one of those bozos give Butters a hard time, I'll make damn sure to shove my Sweet Katana up their anuses. Butters deserves much better, and I owe him at least enough to make sure I can make things a little bit better for him.

Now Stan? he also seems like a nice guy, certainly feels as though he's more...stable than company he keeps. He also seems to want to keep me from being influenced by Cartman, but he acts a little less harsh with me about it, I think he's taking into account that Cartman has undeniably treated me with much more respect than he has with others, I mean, if the worst you get from someone is being constantly called 'Douchebag' like it's just a nickname, I think you might be in more of a good place then you realize.

But back to Stan, is it just me, or is his family is a little.. bizarre? yeah, his dad's pretty weird, and seems abit too casual toward half the shit that goes on around here, but he proved to be a friendly guy and he helped me out alot during my 'quests'. Stan's mom seemed nice, I guess, and I think she's probably where Stan gets most of his sanity from, though I saw rarely her outside the place she works so I still don't know much about her. Stan's sister Shelly, on the other hand, was quite a mess to deal with. Stan had me help him fight his sis to get his IPhone back, it was one of the toughest fights I ever had, but Stan and I won, and Shelly was surprisingly cool with that, well, at least she's been more cordial with me since, and I suspect the revelation that Stan's now capable of holding his own against her will give her pause for thought next time she ever decides to give him any grief.

As for Kenny? I can't make heads or tails of that guy, the first time I met him, he was pretending to be a princess with alot of the stereotypes that go with it, At least I think that's what he's going for. I can barely even understand a quarter of what he says thanks to how he's got most of his face covered in that hood of his.

This wasn't helped by the fact that after we defeated Clyde and invade his castle (long story), Kenny betrayed us and tried to kill me, he even drank that green stuff that turned him into a Nazi Zombie, which somehow made him unkillible until Cartman made me fart on Kenny's balls, yeah, you heard right.

It's times like this that make me question my own sanity.

But anyway, just the day after, 'Princess' Kenny apparently went back to normal and everyone was still chill with him hanging around Kupa Keep, they told me Kenny's whole betrayal thing was just a 'PMS thing' or something, Not sure I'm really okay with that, but it's clear everyone expects me to view what happened as water-under-the-bridge stuff, so I decided I should just forgive and forget. Hopefully once school comes up I'll get the chance to know Kenny out of that dress and wig.

Okay, that didn't come out right, but I think you know what I mean.

Actually, considering most of South Park seems surprisingly forgiving over how I had to beat-up half the kids in town, caused massive property damage, rummage through peoples stuff like a kleptomaniac (which I probably am), I can't say I've been doing much better myself.

But yeah, school is coming up next monday, and after everything I went through, all I want now is to live out a quiet day in relative peace. Luckily, as I said, things have calmed down ever since that night I farted on Kenny's balls, so as long as no super-secret government agencies try to kidnap me in my sleep, I should be alright.

Though considering the things I've accomplished, I frankly doubt there's anything that can stop me.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

But anyway, back to the present...

I woke up this morning thinking about what to do, I've been partially hoping for a break from the whole 'go-out-and-make-friends' thing my parents had me do, which was odd since it's my friend-making abilities are what forced me and my parents to move to South Park in the first place.

Hell, they're fully aware of the fact I can't remember anything before the moment we first came to this so-called 'quiet little mountain town', which leads me to suspect they had to have caused my memory wipe somehow, I know it's far-fetched, but until I can find something the proves they weren't behind this in any way, it'll be too risky to ask them anything about my past. I'll have to figure something out later, but for now I decided to leave that whole deal alone until I'm ready to look into it.

Anyway, I checked my phone to see if any of my new friends want me for anything; but bizarrely enough, I got two posts on my Facebook from both Cartman and Kyle telling me something I wasn't expecting to hear.

Cartman post said, " _Hey Douchebag, I heard about that slumber party the girls invited you over, just do me a solid and don't listen to anything bad they say about me, the girls sometimes like to make me look bad."_

 _Oh yeah, only God knows why there..._ I sarcastically thought to myself

Anyway, Kyle's post said, " _King Douchebag, you're no doubt aware you've been given a rare honor and privilege of being the only boy invited to a girl's slumber party, just remember to listen to everything bad they say about Cartman, hopefully they can help you see that fatass wizard for what he really is, also, if you hear any of the girls admit to having a crush on me, let me know, okay? thanks. But on an unrelated note, should I just keep calling you Douchebag? or do you prefer Dovahkiin? you never said anything about your real name and Cartman sure as hell never told anyone anything, so please clarify what you want me to call you so I don't get mixed up, and please actually respond, we all know you can talk even if you don't like to." _

Great, I said one sentence and already someone wants to seriously pressure me into talking more often.

I could only pray Kyle doesn't tell my Dad about that time I did speak last night, he'd have a field day with this. But in all fairness, I brought this on myself the moment I said; "Screw you guys, I'm going home," after the whole deal with Clyde and Nazi Zombie Princess Kenny was over, but between everything I went through and those things that Big Bad Government Guy said about me, I had alot on my mind and wanted some time to myself to rest and think about what happened. If I said nothing at that point, I could've gotten away with my friends thinking I'm mute, or at least too shy to talk.

The later being sort of true, since I've never been used to the kind of attention the other kids have been giving me lately, plus I still sometimes don't know what to say at certain moments.

On the other hand, if I stayed silent right to the end, and keep staying silent afterward, I might just be letting Cartman and Kyle take control of every bit of free time I have, so unless I want that, I better be willing to be at least a little assertive.

So I guessed I'd have to brace myself for having to talk at least a little bit more often, I made a mental note to reply to Kyle's post later.

But something just struck me at that point.

I was actually invited to a slumber party? granted, I did read a post a day ago from Wendy mentioning it, but I didn't think about it much when I first read it.

Clearly, the invitation for me was genuine, but I don't remember when I'm supposed to arrive.

As I took off my pajamas and started slipping on my regular clothes I suddenly heard a knock on the front door.

"I'll get it!" I heard my mom call out.

I heard the door open, then heard a voice I recognized instantly;

"Good Morning! you're Dovahkiin's mom I'm guessing?" said a voice that I knew could only be Annie Knitts.

"Indeed I am!" Mom said in her usual pleasant tone, obviously figuring that Annie must've been one of the many friends I made these past three days, "Who might you be?"

"I'm Annie Knitts, I'm here to remind Dovahkiin he's been invited to a sleepover at Bebe's and take him there," Annie said, "Wendy posted a Facebook post to him as an invite, but he's been very busy playing with the other boys at the time, so the girls sent me over in case he didn't have time to read that post."

"Wow, sound like he's been doing alot since we moved here," Mom commented.

"Yeah, well technically the sleepover was supposed to be next weekend," Annie said, "But Wendy convinced us to move it to earlier, that's another reason the girls wanted me to bring him over, they're hoping he'll be able to come before the boys pull him away before he can get a chance to decide to go or not."

So the girls decided to have the sleepover early, this probably explains why Cartman and Kyle sent me those posts, though jokes on Annie, since those two clearly want me to go anyway.

I just finished getting dressed when I heard my mom say, "Oh, that's sweet of you, come on in, we'll check to see if he's awake."

I decided to save my mom and Annie some time by walking out of my bedroom myself, they saw me just as they got upstairs.

"Good Morning, sweetums," my Mom said, "Your friend Annie told me you've been invited to a sleepover, would you like to come?"

I knew I'm never gonna be able to give the blank stare response forever after last night, and I felt I owed people at least some interaction, so I did something somewhat unexpected;

I nodded my head.

Annie seemed a little surprised by me giving an actual response, but my mom simply gave a warm smile, I wondered if she figured I was now getting more comfortable with living here.

"That's wonderful!" my mom replied, "pack yourself an extra set of clothes and pajamas, I'll pull out one of the sleeping bags we have in the basement."

Mom went back downstairs as I went back to my room to pack my stuff, I noticed Annie entered my room as soon as I finished.

"Nice room," Annie commented, "Though it looks like you haven't finished unpacking yet."

Yeah, she was right, there were still a handful of unopened cardboard boxes I haven't bothered opening, I think my parents unpacked most of my stuff for me while I was out 'playing' with my friends.

"I saw some of what you did at Clyde's tower last night," Annie continued, "You were amazing, I don't think I've ever seen a boy a courageous as you."

Personally, while I appreciated the flattery, I'm not sure what I did these past three days counted being something courageous, the way I saw it, I was simply doing what the other kids have been telling me to do. I will admit though, I found some of the more insane tasks they made me do more enjoyable than I want to admit.

"Me and the other girls also want to apologize about what you went through," Annie said, "Just to help us find out who was spreading those rumors, it took alot more work on your part than we intended."

Like fighting someone's 5th grader boyfriend, infiltrating an abortion clinic, and running around Canada? nah, wasn't too much trouble at all.

At least that's what I'm tempted to say in response, but somehow I couldn't bring myself to let those words out.

But I'm actually not trying to be sarcastic about it, yeah, if I haven't made it clear already, I actually enjoyed most of the adventures I had so far, yeah there were some things I wish I didn't have to go through, especially that whole going-up-someone's-ass thing, but nearly everything else was pretty exciting for me. But even I sometimes want a break from that, for the same reason you'd want to at least sometimes try a different meal even if you get served your favorite food every day.

And to be fair, I guess I should appreciate that the girls were apparently concerned with what I went through.

"I don't mean to pry," Annie suddenly added, "But you can talk, right? Stan told Wendy (who later told me and the other girls) that he, Kyle and Eric heard you say one sentence just last night."

I froze, I tried to give a verbal response, but for some reason the words were suddenly lost to me, it was like I was subconsciously fighting the urge to talk when a part of me genuinely wants to.

Annie looked worried, "Oh! sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I guess you don't really like to talk."

I thought for moment, I knew I couldn't just avoid talking forever and since kids in town apparently know that I actually can talk, I'll have to learn to get used to talking somehow.

But then I thought, _what if I could find a way around that?_

A metaphorical light bulb started glowing over my head as I pulled out my phone; I decided if I can't respond with my voice, that I'll just text what I want to say, I've sometimes done this with Butters while we were out on adventures, so I figured I might as well use it on everyone.

I texted to Annie, _" Not your fault, I don't even remember any other time I've talked myself, hell, I usually never know what to say."_

Annie heard her phone ring and pulled it out to read my message, she beamed with delight.

I quickly texted, _" Please keep this message to yourself, though, if my parents find out, I'm not sure how they'd react and I still don't feel ready to do this sort of thing openly."_

"Okay," Annie said, "At least you finally found a way past that language barrier you've been giving people. Though I think you shouldn't use it too much when we get to the sleepover, you got this strong, silent type image you'll want to maintain."

"Oh, sweetie!" I heard my mom call out, "I found one of the sleeping bags!"

I figured this was my queue, so I strapped-on my backpack with my stuff in it and headed downstairs with Annie following me. My mom stood at the bottom waiting for me.

She gave her usual soothing smile as she handed me a rolled-up sleeping bag, it looked as though it was just my size, which suggested that I slept over in places before, or maybe even went camping before.

I thought to myself; _next time I get back home, I should seriously do some digging on my past. Now that I think about it, the basement's one of the few rooms in the house I haven't been into yet,_ so I made a mental note to look for something here first chance I get. Even if it's not connected to why the Government's been chasing me, I figured it wouldn't hurt to find a photo album or something to learn about what I've done before moving to South Park.

"Would you like me to drive you two to where the sleepover is?" my mom asked.

"thanks, but Bebe's house is just around two blocks from here, I can take him there myself," Annie replied.

Annie then suddenly grabbed my right hand (I was using my left arm to hold my sleeping bag), I suddenly found myself blushing for some reason, my mom even saw me doing so and giggled slightly.

"Well, I better not keep you two," my mom said, "Have fun, my little gum drop, and be safe!"

 _Have fun? sure, be safe? that'd be my lucky day if I can pull that off,_ I thought to myself as I waved goodbye to my mom and follow Annie out of the house.

As we started walking down the sidewalk, Annie suddenly commented, "Wow, your mom's really nice, though I don't think I've ever heard a mom give that many pet names."

I texted in response, _"_ _Yeah, She's done this for as long as I can remember,"_ which wasn't very long in this case. I decided to try to keep the whole 'Can't-remember-anything-beyond-moving-to-South-Park' to myself for now, I don't know if my parents are the ones behind how I lost my memory, but whether or not that are, I can't risk saying, or texting, anything that could tip them off, at least until I know who I can trust among my friends to keep secrets.

It took us less than two minutes to get to Bebe's house, Annie moved ahead of me and knocked on the door. Seconds later, the door opened and we saw Bebe.

"Wow! great! you're both here!" Bebe said surprisingly energetically, "Come in! come in!"

Both Annie and I entered the house, I heard Bebe quickly close the door behind me.

"Wow, you're still a little early," I heard yet another familiar voice, I turned to see yet another familiar face;

Wendy Testaburger, though considering she still has the sort of healthy figure you'd expect from a 10-year-old girl, I imagine she hasn't really tested too many burgers.

"All that's left is to wait for the other two girls, they should be here shortly though," Wendy said.

 _Two girls?_ I thought, _Counting me, Annie, Wendy, and Bebe, that would make it a 6-people sleepover, somehow I thought it would be bigger._

I heard my phone ring, I got two more Facebook posts.

Again, from Cartman and Kyle.

Cartman's post said; " _King Douchebag, as I'm feeling generous and there are certain things that just caught my attention, I hereby declare that you're to officially take the day off from your duties to Kupa Keep, one the sole condition that you are NOT to leave Bebe's house until the girls tell you you can, even if it means you might be stuck here for a few days longer than planned, got it?"_

 _That's weird, even by Cartman's standards,_ I thought to myself, _why does he want me to stay here? and how does he know I'm already in Bebe's house?_

Anyway, Kyle's post said; _"Douchebag... or Dovahkiin? whatever you're called, you probably already know that you've made quite afew waves since the day you moved in. And while you obviously made a lot of friends these past three days, I should warn you that you've also made almost just as many enemies, some enemies are people you've already known while others you might not even know about yet. Which is why I insist you cooperate when I say you must stay with the girls in Bebe's house until they tell you it's safe to leave, I know I might be sounding vague to you, but trust me, it's best you just lay low for now, there are some things that are going on that make drawing attention to yourself the last thing you want to do."  
_

 _Both Cartman AND Kyle are telling me I have to stay with the girls until they say I can leave?_ I thought, _Why? what's going on? what am I being kept safe from? and what did Kyle mean my parents have been 'filled in'?_

As you can imagine, I was frustrated and confused.

"Hey, New Kid, is everything alright?" Wendy asked, I looked away from my phone once I heard her, "When you looked at your phone, you looked for a moment like something sparked your ire."

Funny, this would probably be the first time I emoted without noticing, I wondered if I was losing my touch. I had a feeling girls themselves are also behind this whole situation, but figured maybe they'd be willing to explain things to me, so I held up my phone and showed them the post Kyle sent me.

Wendy in particular looked a little guilty when she saw the post, "Oh, sorry about that, we thought about sending you a post explaining everything, but we didn't want you to worry too much."

I texted to Wendy; _"So what am I supposed to be hiding from?"_

"I'm not sure if you noticed," Wendy said, "But while you've done alot of things since you came here, not many people were happy about it. I think a good example would be Tweek's parents."

 _"Why would Tweek's mom and dad be mad at me? All I did was help Tweek get that package from Kenny's place, those guys who were supposed to give it to me attacked me!"_ I texted.

"Don't worry, we know it's not your fault," Bebe said, "But after what you did, at least half of the meth heads in town started packing up and leaving for fear you'd come after them next, and the other half's reluctant to sell to the Tweaks."

"Since then, Mr. and Mrs. Tweak have been pretty sore about mostly losing one of their major suppliers," Annie said, "This combined with the collective public boo's they've been given when they decided to blame you for what happened has caused their business to suffer quite abit lately, and just this morning the police started investigating Tweaks Coffee when they found out about how the Tweaks put meth in their coffee."

 _'Collective public boos', huh?_ I thought to myself _, I guess it's impossible to deny that my superhuman friend-making abilities has perks to it. But either this definately sounds like the Tweaks are having a bad day, I guess I should be glad that at least Tweek wasn't blamed.  
_

"But if I know Mr. and Mrs. Tweak, they're usually quite mellow," Wendy said, "They'll likely cool off after a couple of days, even if things might be starting to look a little bleak for them."

I texted _"But in the meantime, I have to stay here in case they decide to grab torches and pitchforks and start a witch hunt on me? Sound awfully excessive for me to hide just from two people."_

"I'll admit that's unlikely to happen," Wendy said, "But I'm sure you noticed by now weirder things have happened in this town, and even that's not the case, in three days you've pissed off the hallway monitors, homeless people, 6th graders, bottom line is you've made almost as many enemies as you did friends. So it's best you keep your head down 'till the heat dies off."

I hated to admit it, but I knew Wendy had a point, I was still not sure I needed to hide from the bozos I made enemies of, but I felt I shouldn't argue, I didn't want spoil the sleepover with a heated debate about whether to fight or hide from my foes. Besides, I figured this whole situation must've been why the girls moved that sleepover to an earlier date.

Suddenly, we heard a knock on the door.

"Must be the other girls, I'll get it," Bebe said as she approached the door, when she opened it and saw who was outside, she said, "Great! you're just in time!"

I have to say, I certainly was surprised with who I saw enter the house...


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Ever get those surprises that make you sarcastically think to yourself; 'Great, that's just what I needed'?

Well, I got that surprise in the form of Princess Kenny.

I know I'm supposed to forgive and forget how he tried to kill me back when we were on Clyde's Tower, and yeah, even at this moment I knew I should work my hardest not to call him out on it. But for a while, every time I saw him I kept wondering if he was gonna try something with me again.

Even putting that aside, that guy was a riddle to me, I could barely understand anything he says, my first meeting with him involves him pretending to by a girly princess, and he somehow has everyone just going along with it. I've had to work with him several times yet I still knew almost nothing about him, he was just that hard for me to get any read on. Way I saw it, it was a little hard to trust someone like that.

But to be fair, Kenny wasn't the only guest that walked into Bebe's House.

Shyly hiding behind Kenny was his sister Karen. I only met her once afew days ago when I visited Kenny's house, so I didn't know much about her either. But I knew I could at least understand her and she strikes me as at least someone I'd like to know more about.

"Ah, welcome to my humble abode, your highness," Bebe cheerfully said with mock formality as she curtsied to 'Princess' Kenny. If nothing else, it was obvious she was just playing along, "And who might this be hiding behind your regal stature?"

Karen tried to move away but Bebe quickly picked her up before she could go anywhere and carried her toward where she was in front of Kenny so that she was in full view of everyone.

"You must be the Princess' sister," Wendy said to Karen just after Bebe placed her back on the floor, "you should be proud, not everyday someone can beat a princess at being the cutest girl in the room."

Kenny giggled, "Tee hee hee! Mmmph Mmmmph mmmmph mmmph," I couldn't tell what he said, but I figured that he was agreeing with Wendy.

Karen blushed, which made me figure she was flattered by that comment, though she looked as though as she was getting nervous. Obviously she wasn't used to this kind of attention.

"What do you think, Dovahkiin?" Annie asked me, nudging her head toward Karen, clearly wanting me to state my opinion of her adorableness.

"I….." I tried to talk, but at my first syllable, the rest of my attempted sentence was lost to me, and I think I sounded like I was out of breath.

Kenny and all the girls chuckled at the epic fail that was my attempt at speech. Oddly enough, even Karen giggled.

I didn't mind too much, almost everyone in town already knows about my unwillingness to talk. Plus, I think I made Karen feel a little better knowing she's not the only shy person in the room, even if my vocal cords were the shyest part of me.

"Wow, a whole syllable!" Wendy teased, "Seems our little New Kid's starting to become a big boy."

I tried to say something else, but no words came out of me, I couldn't even bring myself to say "I," again, it was as if my nerves started screaming 'NO!' to my vocal cords. I think I was even shaking from my struggle to utter any more words.

I clearly had a long way to go before I could will myself to speak full sentences.

Wendy and Karen both noticed my discomfort, they both looked concerned.

"Are…. are you okay?" Karen finally spoke up.

I quickly pulled out my phone and texted, _"Don't worry, I'm fine, I guess working up the will to talk is even harder for me than I thought. "_

"Seems that doing so makes you nervous," Wendy pointed out, she then placed her hands on my shoulders and turned me to where the kitchen was, "Maybe some water will help cool you down."

Bebe looked as though a lightbulb suddenly glowed over her head and gave a slightly mischievous grin as she turned to Karen, "Speaking of water, I see no reason a princess' royal sister shouldn't also get a royal welcome, in the form of say…. A royal bath?"

If Karen could blush a deeper shade of red, it would be easy to mistake her for a tomato. She slowly walked backwards until her back was to Kenny.

"Mph mmph, mmmph, mmmph mmmph mmmph!" Kenny muffed in a gentle tone, Karen calmed down slightly in response, which made me figure that Kenny was telling his sister that things will be okay.

Karen still seemed reluctant to move from where she stood, but she slowly followed Bebe and Annie to the bathroom, with Kenny in tow.

Wendy showed me to the kitchen, she quickly found me a clean glass and filled it with water before handing it to me. I admit I felt a little better after taking afew sips.

"You're probably wondering about Kenny, right?" Wendy asked.

I was a little surprised by Wendy's question, though admittedly there were more than a few factors that made the bizarreness of him being there obvious.

I thought for a moment then texted; _"Yeah, a little, but I'm guessing he's here to make sure I don't leave early, right?"_

"Well, that's part of it," Wendy agreed, "But mostly he's here for Karen's sake."

Yeah, I was curious about her, so I asked _"Speaking of Karen, why's she here? Last I checked, she's got nothing to do with my 'situation'"_

"All I know is that Kenny called Bebe a few hours ago and asked if he could bring Karen over," Wendy answered, "we didn't want to pass up having someone as adorable as Karen around, so we said yes, if you're really curious, you could ask Kenny yourself."

I gave her a deadpan look and texted, _"I would, but sadly if I remember right, I flunked the last 'muffled talk' class I attended."_

Wendy chuckled, "oh right, you're still new here. I wouldn't worry though, I'm sure you'll pick up on it eventually, everyone does."

 _So the girls allowed Kenny to bring Karen over because of how adorable she is?_ I thought, _heh, sounds legit._

"So, you like South Park so far?" Wendy asked.

" _Well, bruises aside,"_ I texted, _"I think things are getting really good. I guess it helps that I've befriended almost everyone in South Park."_

"No kidding," Wendy agreed, "Just three days and you've already become the next Bridon Gueermo."

" _Who's Bridon?"_ I asked.

"Oh, you haven't met him yet?" Wendy asked, "Well, once school comes back up, I'm sure you soon will, He's a third grader that ended up being the most popular kid in school, it's abit of a long story, but I think he'd be impressed with the things you've pulled off. I'd avoid his dad though, he's not really threatening, but he's pretty much an ass."

Wendy gave a look of startled realization, "Actually, now that I think about it, I've heard nothing about your parents, what are they like?"

That question caught me off-guard, had Wendy asked yesterday or earlier, I could've gotten away with not answering. But since she knew I'm now willing to give some interaction, I knew she was gonna expect an answer.

I had a feeling that lying to Wendy might only cause problems, and I figured she'd have no reason to reveal my secret if I told her, so I decided for now to trust her.

" _It's a little… complicated,"_ I texted, _"Can you promise to keep a secret?"_

Wendy looked worried, "Why? They didn't hurt you or anything, did they?"

" _No! no, it's nothing like that,"_ I texted, _"But here's the thing; I literally can't remember anything from before I moved to South Park, the first thing I remember was being in a car with my parents just before we started moving in."_

Wendy was shocked, "Wow, really? Why can't you remember anything?"

" _I don't know for certain,"_ I explained, _"But I suspect my parents might've somehow wiped my memory, they made it obvious that they know I can't remember anything, and I managed to eavesdrop on them one time and I found out they genuinely don't want me to remember my past because of something that happened to me."_

"I'm guessing it has something to do with the government coming after you?" Wendy asked, I was surprised by that statement, but she quickly added, "Stan told me about that last night."

" _Yeah,"_ I texted, _"I think it must have something to do with that, so I think you understand why I need to keep this secret, at least for now. My parents may have good intentions, but they still lied to me and kept my own past from me, and if they find out I know the truth, there's no telling what will happen."_

"So you don't think you can trust your parents?" Wendy asked.

" _I'll put it this way;"_ I texted, _"I get more honesty and trustworthiness from Cartman, and even I know that's saying something. "_

"Yeah, let me give you some advice on that;" Wendy said, then added with some firmness to her voice "Don't. Trust. Cartman. He may be friendly to you at first, but it'll only be a matter of time for he decides he wants to straight up use you and get you in trouble."

" _And if that happens, I'll kick his ass in twenty different ways,"_ I texted, _"So yeah, don't worry, I'll be ready for him."_

Both Wendy and I heard suddenly heard Bebe's voice, "See? that wasn't so bad! I don't think anyone's ever seen you this clean."

"Sounds like Karen's done with her bath," Wendy said, "Don't worry, I'll keep what you've told me a secret, in the meantime, Bebe's got a lot of fun stuff planned for us!"

I followed Wendy back to the living room, Karen was the first to walk out of the bathroom, and sure enough, she looked… different, I mean, putting aside the fact she was only wearing a towel (which made sense, she just out of a bath), the dirt smudges on her face were completely gone, and she had a new hair style; gone was her brown hair being straight down, it was now in cute little pigtails.

"Wow, Karen, you look a lot better already!" Wendy cheered.

Karen simply blushed while clinging to her towel very tightly.

"She does, doesn't she?" Bebe said in agreement as she walked out of the bathroom, Kenny walked out as well, but I didn't see Annie with them.

" _Hey, where's Annie?"_ I asked.

"Oh, I asked her to put Karen's clothes in the laundry after she stripped down for her bath," Bebe answered, "by now Karen's clothes likely still in the washing machine."

Annie suddenly came in from a door that looked like it lead to the basement.

"Hey there, sorry I took so long, I got distracted texting with my mom," Annie said, "But anyway, Karen's clothes are all in the washer now!"

 _All of them? As in very piece of clothing Karen brought with her?_ I thought.

I texted with concern, _"You're not gonna make her spend her first few hours here just wearing a towel, are you?"_

After looked at my text on her phone, Bebe at first looked at me confusingly, "What are talking abou- oh! Ah cr-" Bebe was about to swear, which prompted Kenny to swiftly cover Karen's ears out of reflex, but Bebe managed to stop herself, "well, I found Karen's pajamas in her backpack and gave them to Annie to be washed, 'cause they also looked dirty. Sorry, Karen, I didn't think this through.

Karen surprisingly giggled in response, "Hehe! Actually, you didn't have to."

Karen then turned to her 'sister' Kenny and said, "well, Kenny, looks like we should get out that new pair you bought me earlier. We'll be right back."

Both Kenny and Karen walked back into the bathroom and closed the door behind them. Less than a minute later, they walked out with Karen now wearing pink footed pajamas that had flowers on it.

"Kenny only bought these for me afew days ago, and I only tried it on once, so it's clean," Karen said, and sounded surprisingly more enthusiastic to boot.

With Karen's wardrobe crisis averted, the girls breathed a sign of relief.


End file.
